Still stepping…

… one foot in front of the other – one step at a time.  Sometimes two steps back, and one forward, but at least – I think – I am facing in the right direction.  Having come from a background of being naturally skinny, and never needing to really go on a diet, I had no idea it would be so difficult to lose weight.  But, the difficulty isn’t so much in dieting – we all know what we should do to lose weight, be healthy and be fit, i.e. focus on what you eat, focus on how much you eat, make sure you exercise.

The difficulty comes in actually doing it.

And that is where changing one’s thinking comes into play.  When you start to think differently, the theory is that you will start to act differently, thereby achieving your desired result.  However, the converse is also true, when you start to act differently – very often your actions cause you to think differently – thereby also achieving your desired result.  In other words, actions needs to accompany thoughts, and vice versa.

And yet, losing weight, maintaining that weight loss and not being paranoid about it isn’t easy.

It’s very, very difficult to do.

And sometimes, when I want to run ahead or I’m getting frustrated that this is taking so long, I remember that when I started running, it took a while before I could run 5km without having to stop to take a breathe…

It takes time!

Rome was not built in a day!

As frustrating as it is, the only thing I can keep doing is to continue working on my actions and my thoughts and almost forget about the results – until the day I do start seeing the results.

Does any of this make sense?

I hate diets!

Seriously, I do.  I have never been on a diet in my life – Oh, I sort of toyed with the idea of going on a diet, but actually doing it?  Never…

The thing is – I don’t believe in diets.  I believe in moderation.  And perhaps that is my problem… I battle to be moderate when it comes to food.  Especially delicious, yummy, cooked by my husband food…

I eat when I am hungry.

I eat from enjoyment.

I eat when I am bored.

I eat when I feel anxious.

I eat when I am lonely.

I eat when I am fearful.

I eat to make sure I am still eating.

I eat just to eat.

And I figure no diet or trying to eat in moderation will work until I get my mindset right.  And that isn’t easy…

I eat when I am hungry.  Okay, this one I well, I gotta to do to live.

I eat from enjoyment.  What else is there that I can do for enjoyment besides for eating?

I eat when I am bored.  When I find that enjoyment thing from above, perhaps I can do that instead of eating when I am bored?

I eat when I feel anxious.  I have to realise that there is a Blessed Controller and there is never truly a reason to be anxious.

I eat when I am lonely.  Perhaps connecting with my hubby and Baby Girl more would alleviate this – truly getting intimate with them and building lifelong connections with friends and family.

I eat when I am fearful.  Same as for anxiety.

I eat to make sure I am still eating.  If I’m alive – then I am eating.

I eat just to eat.  Perhaps finding something else to do and something else to think about…

Okay, I am still putting one foot forward on my weight loss journey.

Boot camp tonight – looking forward to that.  Last week I couldn’t walk from Boot camp.  Let’s see how I feel tomorrow…